23 February 2008

Dustin for Taoiseach!

As I have feared - and predicted earlier - Dustin the Turkey (photo) did win Eurosong 2008 and will now be the official representative of the Republic of Ireland in this year's Eurovision Song Contest on May 24th in the Serbian capital Belgrade.

If there would be any need to prove that the Irish are a mad nation, and that voting is not our strong side, this would be it. Unfortunately we have known that already for quite some time, looking at the results of the last three general elections...

For Irish people the vote for Dustin was probably not more than "a laugh", a bit of craic, and maybe a slight two-finger gesture towards the ever so serious movers and shakers in the music industry. It was a typical action for an insular people who know very little of the rest of Europe, and do not give a hoot for it either. Never mind all the Poles and other foreigners working here. As long as they do their jobs for low wages, we don't care.

So, dear compatriots, be not surprised when we will become the laughing stock of Europe (and perhaps even further afield) for sending the stuffed puppet of a turkey to an international and well-televised contest that we once not only took very seriously, but also used to win. No matter how well or poorly Dustin will perform in Belgrade, the turkey image will stick and become an idea other - and way more serious - nations in Europe will associate with Ireland. Dustin will in future be the companion of the "lazy Paddy" when people think of our country.

In light of his great election success tonight, I propose a further career move for the singing and plain speaking turkey. When he returns from his mission to Belgrade in late May, he should take over the reigns of the country and become the next Taoiseach when Bertie Ahern steps down. If he can win a vote like the one tonight, he should be easily elected with overwhelming majority by the Irish people. He could not be doing things much worse than Bertie, and I am sure he would remember it when someone gives him a large sum of money. And, being a turkey, he would most certainly never vote for Christmas, which could only improve the physical and spiritual health of the nation... Dustin for Taoiseach! Dustin for Taoiseach!

The Emerald Islander


The Wild Goose said...

It's great to see how concerned you are about the country's image but even better to see how productive you have been after the little break (I was missing "my daily column"). The sharp sarcasmus of this entry shows a very sofisticated sense of humor.

Alexander "Sunny" Bergen said...

I don't really care much about the Eurovision Song Contest either, but your suggestion that the choice of a turkey as the national representative might make Ireland the butt for jokes is very realistic.
It has already started, with the way the BBC reported the story. And the headline on the BBC's own website (which is usually very serious) reads: Fowl Irish entry for Eurovision as puppet wins national vote

K8 the Gr8 said...

Stuffed?!?! What do you mean 'stuffed'? Dustin is reeaal, man. It's all a clever ploy.


Well, thank you Wild Goose. And yes, I am somewhat concerned with the state and image of Ireland. And it is with joy that I read your comments as well, since you appreciate what I put on paper (or rather on the screen).

Yes, Alexander, I saw that headline as well, and I am sure there are many more - and probably even much harsher ones - that I have not seen. Even Margot Wallstroem, the Vice President of the EU Commission and Commissioner for institutional relations and communication strategy, wrote on her weblog, even though with tongue-in-cheek, that one cannot trust a country that sends the puppet of a turkey to a song contest for people. What might well be a great joke for the Irish is an insult to many of the continental Europeans, who have a different sense of humour. We have to realise that the Irish sense of humour does not travel well abroad, especially not where people don't speak English.

And K8, I think that I know what you mean. Dustin is of course real, as real as the Taoiseach and Santa. But he is also stuffed, like we all are to a certain extent under the current Irish government.

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